All posts by breannmihaila

I am a builder, entrepreneur, and creative designer. Business ideas fill my mind daily and I can never seem to satiate the desire to grow, develop and expand. Simply put, I love testing limits and bringing the world of creative design to the world of business. Let's create something new shall we?

I’m Not Who You Think I Am: 6 Real Things About My Heart.

There are so many times where I wish that we would choose to see hearts instead of personas or stereotypes. I wish that we would take the time to get past our own frustrations and hurts and look objectively at what people are trying to say rather than assume that we already know them and their intent. I say this not because I always choose to (there are days I most definitely fail), but I say this because I think it holds true regardless if we choose to be strong enough to listen. I think what I am really getting at is that as of this past year there are so many moments that I wish I could speak and people would actually listen to my heart.

This is my attempt at speaking from my heart, and hoping that anyone reading will listen rather than judge or stereotype who you think I am.

Because until you know who I am before coffee or after I’ve had to “people” all day, you really don’t know me.

Now I could go into some “I Am” speech to tell you all about me but instead here’s the world through my eyes as of recent….

“We live in a world where everyone wants to be known and they want to be fulfilled but the reality is we have done a very poor job at being a safe culture where others can be authentic. I hold the church accountable for this. Now, if you are not a christian, I just used the word church, so you might be on guard (which I get). Oh but if you are a Christian, I just used the word accountable, so you are probably on guard too. No matter which way you paint this scenario once “church” comes into the equation, my personal history shows that people stop listening to my heart.

The Christians stop listening because they are already offended. The world stops listening because they were offended by the Christians. 

Now, hold for one moment and remember that I started this post by asking you to listen to my heart. So please, listen.

What you don’t know about me #1: If I didn’t know God apart from the church, I would be an atheist. 

I understand the pain that the church has caused people more than most people will ever know. In fact every big point in my life where I have been hurt has come from the church. I understand being offended by the word “Church” because to be honest sometimes, I am too.

The church has been the source of so much pain for me, SO much pain. When people talk about a dislike to “Church Goers” the sad part is that I can’t argue with them because I see what they see.  And in effort to be completely honest, I would be an atheist right now if who I know God to be was dependent on the insulting attempt of the church to portray him.

I can’t support what the church is doing. I simply won’t. I see hypocrisy. I see fake. I see unaccountable people who hurt others and don’t fix it. I see broken people trying to convince the world they are whole. I see people causing ruin to relationships around them and leaving shambles of hearts calling themselves “Christians”.

What you don’t know about me #2: I have a very big problem with how the church handles hearts. 

If you are a Christian, congratulations on making it this far in this post. My guess is you are either pretty frustrated with me and thinking of the best reply to remind me of “who the church is” or you are actually trying to see my heart. If it is the latter, than thank you.

You see, what I want more than anything is to be able to talk to the hearts that the church has hurt. I want to be given a moment where I can talk of God and not have someone tie me to some church, which is responsible for some wound, somewhere on their heart.

What you don’t know about me #3: I see God apart from the church. 

When I said that almost every big pain I’ve gone through in life was due to the church, I meant it. It shouldn’t be that way. And the bigger problem is that every attempt I’ve made to bring it up to the church, has gone unvalidated. I would understand this response if it was just my pain and my heart. But I’ve seen so many people hurt by the church that I know it’s not specific to my heart. This is where I get caught. This is the church. THE CHURCH, which is supposed to represent God to the world and they are massively failing.

What you don’t know about me #4: I don’t see people helped by the Church, I see them broken by it. 

This is a problem. Because the God I know doesn’t break people, yet his church does. I’m not asking you to look at some attendance count on Sunday morning, I’m asking you if the church is building people that will last. Is the church building people that are strong? Is the church building people who know who they are? Is the church building people of character? Is the church creating a culture of love? Because if they did I can promise you the the “church death toll” would be lower.

What you don’t know about me #5: I would love to be able to say that I believe in God and love him without those who have been hurt by the church looking at me like I am absolutely insane because to them he is the church. 

So if you listen to any part of my heart, let it be this. God is not the failing church. I don’t know how to really portray this or say it and know anyone will listen, but I know that if I don’t say it, it will never get the chance to be heard. And if its never heard then the world will go on, being hurt like I’ve been without knowing that the church isn’t God. God isn’t pain. God isn’t the wounds the church has caused. God isn’t divisive. God isn’t rejection. God isn’t full of slander. God isn’t prideful. God doesn’t cause you to doubt your value. God doesn’t cause you to doubt your worth. God isn’t what the church has become and for what it’s become, I’m sorry.

What you don’t know about me #6: I wish I could talk to every heart the church has hurt because than maybe I could show them the God who healed me. 

I have been drunk, high and reckless trying to numb the hurt by those who came with the title “Christian”, I have tried coping with the pain the church caused my heart and I’ve tried masking it. Nothing worked. Everything I tried was a temporary fix, until I remembered the God I knew before….before the failing church of today.

So I leave you with this, I’m not hiding my pain or my healing or pretend that the behavior of the church or “Christians” is okay–It’s not. Its a very big problem and one that the church needs to address. My story is one I will share, because the world needs to know that God isn’t in the people who fail to represent him.”



Don’t listen don’t grow, it’s that simple.

Most of us are all great talkers. Just look at social media, we can talk all day about ourselves, it’s just fantastic right? Who doesn’t love to go online and read all about someone else’s perceived amazing life? Clearly no one, because in return we just talk about more about ourselves. And on and on we go, back and forth, post after post, picture after picture about ourselves.

Now let’s be clear I have zero qualms with self-confidence however when I scroll through Facebook I begin to wonder, do we ever stop to take something in? Or is it all about what we can show the world?

I was reading a research paper earlier (“Effects of Business Embedded & Traditional Training Models on Motivation”)* on the purpose of training and it stated, “Companies learn when their people do.” This struck me. We live in an era of time where we are all about development. Most companies are concerned with how quickly they can advance and most individuals are concerned with what they have to offer to the world and how quickly they can grow. We have the right intent however we talk an awful lot about ourselves for being a generation that professes that they want to grow.

I say this because growing requires us to listen. How are we supposed to grow if we continually talk about what we already know? How perfect our lives appear? Or what a great “selfie” we just took? This is what fills social media and it’s no secret that social media fills our lives. Since this is the case we are obviously all as perfect as our profiles right? (Clearly not, but I think you get my point.)

We need to become a generation that can talk less and listen more. But instead we take offense to anyone who poses some opinion that might mess with our perfect profile or filtered “insta”. We are horrible listeners and we are great at being offended. If we intend to be a people that wants to build a better tomorrow (or better anything really) we must learn when to talk and when to NOT talk but listen.

Listen… when it’s not what you believe. 

Listen… when it’s not your opinion. 

Listen… when it hurts your pride. 

Listen… when it hurts your heart. 

As a generation we have this immediate need to express why we believe we are correct in our belief or actions. However what we don’t realize is that sometimes there are multiple ways you can be correct and when there is only one way, well for the truth there is no substitute. And it really doesn’t need defending or protecting. It’s not something someone can corrupt that’s why it’s the truth. That’s what makes the truth so perfect, you can’t change it, it’s incorruptible and not subject to opinion. So then we shouldn’t be afraid to test it by listening right?

If you are determined to grow then you will take in many opportunities to stop and listen, not because you agree with what is being said but because you are willing to be uncomfortable in order to test your truths. You see, if it’s true, then it cannot be altered and it will prevail any offense. If it’s not then you have found an area to develop. Either way, you win when you listen.

Maybe we can become a generation that talks less about ourselves and instead listens to test our truths. Imagine what we could do if we applied as much effort to finding areas of growth as we do to posting the best “selfie”.

What a generation we would be if we were who we pretended to be on social media.



*Journal of Economics and Behavioral Studies Vol. 2, No. 5, pp. 236-244, May 2011

Belief: Your greatest form of power.

What’s one thing that only you determine, that you can be silent about your entire life, or shout to the whole world, that can enable you to build the unfathomable or be your best kept secret…..? What’s the one thing in this world, that has the power to define your actions in life or the power of silence only to be taken to your grave?

The answer,

…Your belief. 


I had this moment last night where I asked myself what is it about the power of believing that makes such a difference in one’s life whether its believing in a value, or in a theory, or in an ability? I realized that belief….well, belief changes everything. But there’s one caveat: Belief only has this power if we let it.

Belief can be silent. Belief can be loud. Belief can be held close to your heart or belief can be acted out. Belief can be art. Belief can be writing. Belief can be a whisper and belief can be hidden. Belief, has many forms but it will always be doing one of two things. Belief will either be an acted out expression of who you are, or it will be a secret of what you are. 

Whether or not we want it to, our beliefs define us. Think about it….

When the Wright brothers began to build the first plane, they acted from a belief that they could fly. When Amelia Earhart flew across the Atlantic Ocean she did so because she believed that she could be the first female aviator to do so. When Martin Luther King Jr. gave his “I have a Dream” speech, he had a belief that people could be better.

What do all these people have in common? They let belief fuel action. Belief is only as powerful as we let it be. It can have such little power that it can sit inside our hearts our whole life, only to die a silent passion. Or, it can have such massive power that it can stir our hearts to act, and start movements that change the world forever.

Your belief is the most impactful intangible tool you are given in life, but only you have the ability to determine its power. The question is will you give it the ability to make the world better and to leave a legacy of massive impact? Or will you stay silent and let belief hide?

You see belief changes everything, but only if you let it.

So where’s your belief? Can it be seen in your actions? Is it motivating you to change the world around you for the better? Or would those around you be surprised by what you believe if you told them? We have our whole lives to leave a massive impact but it all starts by recognizing the power we have…that power is fueled by your belief.
Choose what you believe wisely because it can change everything if you have the strength to stand in it.

Photo Credit: Kalynne Hill

Coffee and My Heart: 6 Steps on how to not quit during the hard days.

     Good things happen after coffee right? I’m not sure if it’s that my Iced Americano with extra soy is a comfort drink that then makes my heart start to go again or if just the caffeine reminds me I’m alive and have a life to conquer. Whatever it is, coffee is one of my favorite aspects to every day…. Today I was caught here in this thought of how to overcome the days when quitting looks so much better then moving forward toward your goals. I think to not have days where we struggle to remember why the goal matters would take away the humanity aspect to everything we are. The high seasons of life are beautiful because of the days where we fight to just be…human. So let’s start here:
      When you make the decision to accomplish a great goal, live a huge life, value the impact you leave, and constantly strive to level up, life will often be difficult.
     This is not because you’ve done anything wrong. Actually it’s the opposite, you’re  battling the whole status quo, for all of time, in the history of EVER. Most people settle, we’ve discussed this so I won’t kill it again here with the whole “most people want an easy button, glad you chose the Game of Thrones” route to life. So let’s just say you chose the right path young Padawan.  But really, in all seriousness…..
     Here’s how I see it. I chose the hardest route possible when I decided that my life needed to be lived for something more. That everything we’ve talked about this far in these posts had to occur. That BIG was possible. That IMPACT was possible. That living a HUGE life was possible. This decision to live for something bigger then me was my personal turning point. From here on out, I would never end up choosing the easy way. Even if I wanted to, at this point…my heart simply wouldn’t let me.
      As life goes on I constantly realize that the grass is often not greener on the other side, and no that’s not because I failed to water it. When you choose to live a life bigger then you, you are constantly pushing yourself to higher levels. This creates a continual battle. Occasionally there are moments of reprieve where you stand at the top of the mountain you are conquering and take in the view but then you notice another mountain, a bigger, greater, more thrilling mountain…and so the story goes and off to another mountain you go conquer. And as long as you “stop to smell the roses” and take in the moments, this is a win. You’re conquering, you’re growing, you’re impacting.
     However, there will come a point where you exhaust yourself, where the battle is tiring, and quitting has never looked better. I’m still in the process of finding the best way to make it through these moments, but I’ve semi-nailed it down to these 6 steps.
     1. Constantly remind yourself of what’s at the top. Is it a promise your waiting on? Is it an achievement your fighting for that will change your life? Is it other people who will finally get to share in your victory? Whatever it is. Hold to what is at the top of your mountain. It’s important to not wait until you are totally exhausted to do this, trust me. It’s a lot harder to remember the simple reason that made you start to climb this mountain you may be resenting.
      2. Avoid Naysayers. People love to start talking when you start complaining. As soon as you hit that “What have I done? This is stupid why should I care moment?” somehow those who didn’t support your mountain trek have ALL the reasons why you should have stayed home, on your couch….being comfortable. In these moments be VERY careful who you listen to. Remember most people want easy. And let’s be honest, if there’s an easy way normally it would be logical to take it. Maybe the easy way would have cost you character, maybe the easy way would have left less impact, maybe the easy way would have been through a lush trail down a beautiful hillside, not up this massive mountain with rocks, debris and a steep incline. Sure, there was easy. But you didn’t choose easy for a reason. Don’t let those who don’t have your heart, didn’t make it’s decision, and aren’t wanting a massive life to cause you to question your mountain. You made the decision climb because the victory would be worth the building of character to get to the top.
      3. Hang out with other climbers. Here’s my number one point of advice (ironically placed in no. 3) If you are around people who aren’t going where you want to go. Go where you want to go without them. I have found that you normally need to start this journey alone before you find others who want to tag along or climb beside you. Alone is sometimes good, find you first, solidify what you want, and find a mountain to conquer. Trust me, there are other climbers out there…. and you will find them.


     4. Be careful who you let in to the close parts of your heart. I’ll let you in on a little secret. The only people I let into my inner circle are people who want more out of life. If you are interested in settling, that’s totally cool, I love you, I care about you….all that stuff and you can be my friend without a problem. But my heart, the depths of me, to know that is reserved for those who are also going to remind me why I’m fighting. Bear in mind there is a whole lotta me to know outside the depths of my heart so there’s lots for those who aren’t interested in leveling up, but the heart zone is by invitation only. I need to know that when my life gets whacky and I need someone to remind me of the whys behind my choice that those in my inner circle will step up.

     5. Don’t quit. This one is simple. Decide now. Just don’t quit. Whatever the battle,  whatever the mountain, whatever the terrain. There is some reason you decided to embark on this challenge. Don’t quit. You will make it. You will win. And when you do it will be epic.

Sometimes I think we try to look for this perfect life, where we do all the things that we love, we thrive and we are never uncomfortable. That’s not life. And it’s not something I want. I love to fight because I love to win. I love who I become. I love the feeling of reaching a climax. I love growing. I love watching others grow. I love what happens when we are uncomfortable and we embrace it. There is so much to be had in life if we can make it through the seasons that require us to armor up and battle on.

There is a whole world waiting for impact, wanting growth, and desiring to level up. How will we ever reach them if we quit half-way up our own mountains?

Heroes aren’t born, they are built. Let your days of struggle motivate you, let it challenge you, let it push you to push harder then ever before. Remember the victory happened at your decision to live heroically, now you just need to walk it out. Battles are an opportunity for victory.

      6: Pay attention to how you prepare for rough days. Often times this is where I think most people’s plan to succeed fails. They are ready for the victory, but victory over anything always costs something! You can have the best plan for how to achieve your goal but you must calculate in the cost of the days that will just be trials and pain. If you aren’t ready for those days where victory just seems to be a distant dream then you will fall and possibly not get back up. You have to do more then plan to not quit; you must have a purpose for the struggle clearly outlined in your mind or the struggle will overtake you. It’s much easier said then done but plan, make a plan for the days that will suck. I promise you they will come, and if you don’t plan to overcome them, you will be weakened. The most successful plans aren’t those that plan for victory, the most successful plans are those that plan for the struggle. 

My pledge to the failing Church, my pledge to Christians.


I promise to not let your choice to be weak, set the standard of strength in my life. 

I promise to not let your lack of character affect my desire and choice to continually build mine. 

I promise to not let your lack of integrity affect my belief that morals do exist and to apply them wholeheartedly to mine. 

I promise to not let your choice of comfort over growth affect my choice to continually push myself to be better and develop in every trial and every struggle.

I promise to not let your talk of love give you the appearance of of being a genuinely loving entity but rather let your actions define your current capacity to love.

I promise to employ the love He talks of, not the love you show.

I promise to look at your predominantly negative impact to this nation as a representation of your actions, character and personal disciplines not who you claim to follow. 

I promise to look at your wounds and your fears and compare them to the strength in your heart, before I assume you will choose to be strong enough to be the person you appear to be on Sundays or on Facebook. 

I promise to not let your decision in choosing to let division tear apart relationships be a representation of God’s desire for unity, his passion for growth or his ability to heal. 

I promise to not forget your potential or purpose. 

I promise to let your actions define your character not the character of your God. 

I promise to let your choice to settle for subpar in so many aspects of your life be a representation of your weakness, not God’s. 

I promise to let the choices you make to live inside your walls and choose protection over healing or restoring relationship be reflective of your wounds and not the worth of those around you. 

I promise to let the stupid things you do and say go, but still forever wish you see how many people you are hurting. 

I promise to not hate you for the self-righteous words you speak to people who have more character then you, and to not choose to be angry at you for the pain others have felt from your lack of self-control. 

I promise to not assume that your role as a leadership means you live righteously. 

I promise to see all the hearts you have left in ruin while you walk in self-righteous ignorance of your salvation and to try to love those hearts in the ways you have failed. 

I promise to not look to you as a reflection of my God. 

I promise to recognize his grace but acknowledge the expansive affect of your choices. 

I promise to set myself apart from you.

I promise to love you, but not be part of whatever you claim to be. 

I promise to recognize that you are failing miserably to represent the God you claim to follow. 

I promise to try to be a conduit of healing in a world that you have helped shatter. 

I promise to love you and God alike, but to recognize that never in my life has there been such a vast difference between the two of you. 


I have believed in God for 26 years. I have seen him move in my life, I have seen him do things only he can do time and time again. I have also grown up in the church, and while I absolutely believe in God, I do not condone nor support the choices I see in much of the Church today. If you call yourself a “Christian” then at a minimum you should be a genuinely good person, if not then at least be accountable for your choice to be a below average human being. The church is caught up in what I like to call “ignorant grace”, and its this idea that because you have salvation you somehow don’t need to give as much care or concern to how you handle your heart, life or relationships. You are wrong. If you claim to live covered by grace, then you are also claiming to be a christian which in turn is claiming to be a representation of who God is. Therefore you have subjected your life to a high mandate to give all you have to be a person with integrity, character and love so great that your actions speak louder then your words.

I refuse to let the way “Christians” handle relationships, friendships, challenges and trials change my belief of the standard to live with integrity, character or love.

I will build my life daily. I will love even when its hard. I will grow, I will develop in character and I will live my life in excellence. I will fight for relationship. I will continue to push for more, greater and bigger things then I have seen. I will continue to make an impact, and I will continue to not settle. I will live my life in a way that shows that I love God, but make no mistake that I do not share an association with the current reflection of “god” you, christians and the church alike, are giving the world.





Life is…

Life. We’ve been trying to define it for centuries. We take it and we throw in philosophy; we try to teach others its bitter truths and its beautiful joys; we live it everyday and attempt to maybe catch a glimpse of its real meaning. But here’s the simple truth I live by, Life is what I define it to be.

So I define my life as this:


…Is that moment where everything falls apart and I still stand

…Is the second that thrills me.

….Is the hug I desperately needed.

…Is the barista who leaves a cute note wishing me a great day on my iced Americano.

…Is the heart that is so real with me, I wonder how I ever earned the right to hear their story.

…Is the memory that is too perfect to remake.

…Is the depth between my heart and others that only trust can reach.

…Is the seconds I spent conquering fear.

…Is the pain but also the healing.

…Is the tears I’ve cried.

…Is the scars I have.

…Is the secret that one person shares with no one else.

…Is the wins I’ve experienced.

…Is the losses I’ve felt.

…Is the feeling of becoming limitless.

…Is that person who came into my life and never left.

…Is the argument that makes me better.

…Is the wars that I’ve won.

…Is the decisions I’ve made to say yes to the most amazing experiences I’ve ever had.

…Is the time I gave a second, third or fourth chance to trust someone with my heart.

…Is the friendship that has changed my whole life.

…Is that person who’s told me “Because of you, I’ve become me”.

…Is that moment of impact that a heart changed forever for the better.

…Is the time I remembered how I strong I was.

…Is that promise that he made come true.

…Is the depth inside me too great to give words to.

…Is every moment I’ve ever felt joy.

…Is every moment I’ve ever felt heart-wrenching loss.

…Is the hurt that words could never define.

…Is the wholeness I’ve finally found.

…Is that friendship I didn’t quit on.

…Is the person I’ve become in reaching my goals.

…Is the people I’ve made better.




Life. It’s endless; it’s what I make it and it’s what I create. It’s taking every second of every day and remembering that something bigger is happening that could leave a mark on my heart and others. It’s not about my personal wins but everything and everyone I encounter along the way. Life is everything I leave and the person I become.



My white picket fence.

I’ve been told that my standards are too high. I’ve been told that I take on too much. I’ve been told that I should take an easier route. I’ve been told that I should move slower. I’ve been told I need to relax. I’ve been told I need to chill. I’ve been told a lot of things….however I stopped listening. If there is one thing I’ve learned it’s that, sometimes just STOP LISTENING.

Because here’s what I realized, whether or not the above is true doesn’t really matter. Maybe I could take an easier route, but it’s not as fun. Maybe I could do life at a slower pace, but right now I don’t want to. Maybe I could take on less, but there’s no challenge in that. Maybe I could lower my standards, but I can always meet them so why? Maybe I could do it differently, but I’m not going to. So then the next question that begs to be answered is….Why? Why choose hard? Why want a challenge? Why do it as fast as possible? Why take the difficult route? Why? ……….WHY?

We live in a world where we often try to paint life in this box where we know we will win. We are told to do X, Y and Z and boom there’s your white picket fence and there’s that cute home, and there’s your career and there’s the family you wanted, and there’s the cold beer in the fridge and the loving arms to come home to. There’s your whole life….at the end of X, Y and Z. There’s only one problem with this picture and it kinda screws the whole thing up for me.

I can see my life with a white picket fence, a cute home, in a career, raising a family, marrying the man of my dreams and maybe an evening run or dusk walks while the stars come out (let’s be real I will not drink beer every night…EVER). I can see all of that. And that’s great. Just great. Fantastic in fact, there is NOTHING wrong with that picture. It’s actually pretty perfect. It’s almost unreal perfect, but possible so we will stick with perfect. It’s perfect except for one thing…

The girl with that white picket fence who is she? Because until she knows who she is, everything else is just a perfect little picture….JUST a picture. JUST an idea. JUST a theory. It’s JUST a white fence, it’s JUST a cute house, it’s JUST a dream, she has a family but they are JUST people she loves, and him, he is JUST a really good looking man who maybe smells like Calvin Klein and hopefully wears a baseball cap backwards with a white T-shirt… You see we paint these pictures of our lives and in their perfection we forget that it’s JUST a picture. The biggest component, the core, the one source that draws that picture into reality is the artist.

I love the picture, but I also know that the picture is only as powerful as the artist. So, why? Why do I push myself? Why do I choose the hard way? Why do I strive for more then yesterday? Why do I not move slowly?

Well, here’s my why:

Because I am determined to find the capacity of the artist of my picture.

I want to know what she’s capable of. Is she a 4-year old color page or is she a Van Gogh? Is she a Wal-Mart $5.00 sale or is she the Sistine Chapel? And with every challenge, I find more of her, and she, she get’s better.

I think sometimes X, Y and Z just look too easy. So we start to walk this story of life and we start painting, before we understand technique or brushstrokes. We start plugging and playing and using trial and error hoping we get it right. And when we don’t, dreams shatter, families break and love starts to fade. My life is far too valuable for that and so is yours. We only get one shot, and it will be epic if we do it right and take time to build the core, the foundation. Every great masterpiece starts with the artist. Build there first.

So while I’ve been told a lot about my choices, I quit listening. Because I have my life’s picture to paint, and I intend to be a massively talented artist, so I will test myself, I will grow myself and I will expand in my capacity daily. While it may look like a vain effort to choose this route, I assure you it’s not.

My picture will be built from the artist out. I will be great enough, I will be more then strong enough and I will set a standard. Because this isn’t about today, this is about tomorrow. This is about that white picket fence that wraps around a place to belong, this is about a cute house that became a home, this is about raising a family that has character, integrity and will positively impact the world ahead, this is about having kids who understand that respect matters, morals are to be lived out and champions still win. This is about coming home everyday to go on a late night walks with the man of my dreams because I waited and didn’t settle. This is about him, because he is stronger then any man I’ve ever met, with more drive and passion then I thought possible. This is about us, because together we will conquer the world. This is about the people our lives will touch. This is about the generation my family will be a part of.  This is about the impact my picture will create.

So why have I made the choices I have? Because I’m not building a perfect little life with my daily choices. I’m building an myself as an artist that will build a masterpiece which will build a better world. My perfect little picture is a world of massively impactful people.

I’m building me, so I can better build my life. That’s why.