All posts by breannmihaila

I am a builder, entrepreneur, and creative designer. Business ideas fill my mind daily and I can never seem to satiate the desire to grow, develop and expand. Simply put, I love testing limits and bringing the world of creative design to the world of business. Let's create something new shall we?

Life is…

Life. We’ve been trying to define it for centuries. We take it and we throw in philosophy; we try to teach others its bitter truths and its beautiful joys; we live it everyday and attempt to maybe catch a glimpse of its real meaning. But here’s the simple truth I live by, Life is what I define it to be.

So I define my life as this:

LIFE….

…Is that moment where everything falls apart and I still stand

…Is the second that thrills me.

….Is the hug I desperately needed.

…Is the barista who leaves a cute note wishing me a great day on my iced Americano.

…Is the heart that is so real with me, I wonder how I ever earned the right to hear their story.

…Is the memory that is too perfect to remake.

…Is the depth between my heart and others that only trust can reach.

…Is the seconds I spent conquering fear.

…Is the pain but also the healing.

…Is the tears I’ve cried.

…Is the scars I have.

…Is the secret that one person shares with no one else.

…Is the wins I’ve experienced.

…Is the losses I’ve felt.

…Is the feeling of becoming limitless.

…Is that person who came into my life and never left.

…Is the argument that makes me better.

…Is the wars that I’ve won.

…Is the decisions I’ve made to say yes to the most amazing experiences I’ve ever had.

…Is the time I gave a second, third or fourth chance to trust someone with my heart.

…Is the friendship that has changed my whole life.

…Is that person who’s told me “Because of you, I’ve become me”.

…Is that moment of impact that a heart changed forever for the better.

…Is the time I remembered how I strong I was.

…Is that promise that he made come true.

…Is the depth inside me too great to give words to.

…Is every moment I’ve ever felt joy.

…Is every moment I’ve ever felt heart-wrenching loss.

…Is the hurt that words could never define.

…Is the wholeness I’ve finally found.

…Is that friendship I didn’t quit on.

…Is the person I’ve become in reaching my goals.

…Is the people I’ve made better.

 

LIFE IS IMPACT.

 

Life. It’s endless; it’s what I make it and it’s what I create. It’s taking every second of every day and remembering that something bigger is happening that could leave a mark on my heart and others. It’s not about my personal wins but everything and everyone I encounter along the way. Life is everything I leave and the person I become.

 

 

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My white picket fence.

I’ve been told that my standards are too high. I’ve been told that I take on too much. I’ve been told that I should take an easier route. I’ve been told that I should move slower. I’ve been told a lot of things….however I stopped listening. If there is one thing I’ve learned it’s that, sometimes just STOP LISTENING.

Because here’s what I realized, whether or not the above is true doesn’t really matters. Maybe I could take an easier route, but it’s not as fun. Maybe I could do life at a slower pace, but right now I don’t want to. Maybe I could take on less, but there’s no challenge in that. Maybe I could lower my standards, but I can always meet them so why? Maybe I could do it differently, but I’m not going to. So then the next question that begs to be answered is….Why? Why choose hard? Why want a challenge? Why do it as fast as possible? Why take the difficult route? Why? WHY? WHY?!?!?!?

We live in a world where we often try to paint life in this box where we know we will win. We are told to do X, Y and Z and boom there’s your white picket fence and there’s that cute home, and there’s your career and there’s the family you wanted, and there’s the cold beer in the fridge and the loving arms to come home to. There’s your whole life….at the end of X, Y and Z. There’s only one problem with this picture and it kinda screws the whole thing up for me.

I can see my life with a white picket fence, a cute home, in a career, raising a family, marrying the man of my dreams and maybe an evening run or dusk walks while the stars come out (let’s be real I will not drink beer every night…EVER). I can see all of that. And that’s great. Just great. Fantastic in fact, there is NOTHING wrong with that picture. It’s actually pretty perfect. It’s almost unreal perfect, but possible so we will stick with perfect. It’s perfect except for one thing…

The girl with that white picket fence who is she? Because until she knows that everything else is just a perfect little picture. JUST a picture. JUST an idea. JUST a theory. It’s JUST a white fence, it’s JUST a cute house, it’s JUST a dream, she has a family but they are JUST people she loves, and him, he is JUST a really good looking man who maybe smells like Calvin Klein and hopefully wears a baseball cap backwards with a white T-shirt… You see we paint these pictures of our lives and in their perfection we forget that it’s JUST a picture. The biggest component, the core, the one source that draws that picture into reality is the artist.

I love the picture, but I also know that the picture is only as powerful as the artist. So, why? Why do I push myself? Why do I choose the hard way? Why do I strive for more then yesterday? Why do I not move slowly? WHY?

Because I am determined to find the capacity of the artist of my picture. I want to know what she’s capable of. Is she a 4-year old color page or is she a Van Gogh? Is she a Wal-Mart $5.00 sale or is she the Sistine Chapel? And with every challenge, I find more of her, and she, she get’s better.

I think sometimes X, Y and Z just look too easy. So we start to walk this story of life and we start painting, before we understand technique or brushstrokes. We start plugging and playing and using trial and error hoping we get it right. And when we don’t, dreams shatter, families break and love starts to fade. My life is far too valuable for that and so is yours. We only get one shot, and it will be epic if we do it right and take time to build the core. Every great masterpiece starts with the artist. Build there first.

So while I’ve been told a lot about my choices, I quit listening. Here’s my why: I have my life’s picture to paint, and I intent to be a massively talented artist, so I will test myself, I will grow myself and I will expand in my capacity daily. While it may look like a vain effort to choose this route, it’s not.

My picture will be built from the artist out. I will be great enough, I will be more then strong enough and I will set a standard. Because this isn’t about today, this is about tomorrow. This is about that white picket fence, this is about a cute house that became a home, this is about raising a family that has character, integrity and will positively impact the world ahead, this is about having kids who understand that respect matters, morals are to be obeyed and champions still win. This is about coming home everyday to go on a late night walks with the man of my dreams because I waited for him and didn’t settle. This is about him, because he is stronger then any man I’ve ever met, with more drive and passion then I thought possible. This is about us, because together we will conquer the world. This is about the people our lives will touch. This is about the generation my family will be a part of.  This is about the impact my picture will create.

So why have I made the choices I have? Because I’m not building a perfect life with my daily choices. I’m building an amazing artist. Because a picture is only as beautiful as its artist is talented.

I’m building me, so I can better build my life. That’s why.

 

Step 10: YOU define your life.

You. And only YOU….You define your life. It’s really that simple.

We live in a world where everyone is so use to placing blame elsewhere other then taking accountability and owning their actions. However, like most things in life regardless what seems to be occurring there is always the beautiful, wonderful, and sometimes bitter truth. The truth is this: Your entire life rests on you.

We can try to say its because of where we came from. We can try to say we had a rougher start. We can try to say that things would be different if life were fair. But that’s not the case.

You can’t change where you came from.

You can’t change the start you had.

You can’t make life fair.

No matter how much you wish or dream or complain, nothing is going to change that these are things in life you absolutely can NEVER change. So you are left with two choices that will define your whole life.

You can choose to change what you can or you can choose to wallow in what you can never change. 

Did you really read that? Because to be honest I’m tired of victims. The world needs more heroes.

You have your entire life to change, and mold and become something EPIC. But one thing will make or break it. One thing will change your entire future. One thing will dictate you for the rest of forever.

This one thing…….is your decision on how you define your life.

You decide.

Victory or defeat? You decide. Success or failure? You decide. Love or fear? You decide. 

I wish there were less victims in the world, so I’ve decided to start talking about impact and wholeness and heroes…… It was that simple. I’m tired of hearing people play the powerless role. But I also realize that a lot of people haven’t heard differently, they may not know how to NOT be a victim. That’s why I decided to start the Superhero Chronicles, in hopes that maybe the world would start to see more hearts that desire to level up and impact the world around them. Maybe together we could change the status quo, and stop settling for mediocre.

Whether or not the whole world ever hears what I say, or whether or not there is a massive movement of impact and heroes rising only time will tell, but I can promise you this, lives are contagious. So therefore, I intend to live a life of heroic proportions in hopes that others catch a glimpse that life can be huge. Some people may think that sounds conceited, but I really don’t care. I think in terms of massivity (Yes, that is a made up word that says “all the deep things, real things, heart things and hero things”). I believe in heroes. I believe in big people. I believe in conquerors and life changers. I believe in people who defy odds. I believe that there are hearts bigger then most people can handle.

We need to become the generation that can handle bigger people, because there are huge hearts that are tired of hiding.

So how will you define your life? The world is waiting.

 

 

The Superhero Chronicles: 10 Steps to living with IMPACT:

 

STEP 1: YOU ARE NEVER TOO OLD TO WEAR YOUR CAPE.

STEP 2: WHO’S BEHIND THE MASK?

STEP 3: THE WHOLENESS OF THE GIVER.

STEP 4: HEROES DON’T “HALF-ASS” IT.

STEP 5: LEGACY OFFERS NO SECOND CHANCES.

STEP 6: VICTORY IS A DECISION LONG BEFORE IT’S A REALITY.

STEP 7: FACING THE FEAR OF YOU.

STEP 8: WAITING ON EPIC.

STEP 9: THRIVING IN THE BATTLES.

STEP 10: YOU DEFINE YOUR LIFE.

 

If you haven’t been following this series, check out all ten blog posts in the Superhero Chronicles! Comment, share or message with any thoughts!

Photo Credit 

 

Where’s your “safe-world”?

A portion of a series entitled “Conversations with my Heart.”

Me: “Sometimes I wonder why you have to feel so much. I mean don’t you understand that when you let yourself feel, it’s not always going to be good? People won’t always take care of you like they should and you won’t always get the treatment you should and sometimes people will just suck….why feel?”

My Heart: “I’ve learned that if you don’t let yourself feel the bad, the ugly and the hard then you also short yourself the rewarding feelings as well….like the ones of massive impact, deep friendships or love.”

Me: “But you get that logically speaking that’s a really stupid decision at times right? People are mean. And a lot of people just don’t care. Why feel then?”

My Heart: “I do but I also have found that when you let yourself feel, you also help yourself see. I have no idea how these two are connected because it defies everything I learned about my five senses in preschool. But when I let myself feel, I can start to see the hearts behind the hurt they are causing.”

Me: “Sounds like an exhausting savior complex if you ask me.”

My Heart: “I think the best way I’ve ever heard it put was that my caring is at slut level. No joke, someone close to me told me that and I really couldn’t think of a better way to describe it. It’s very accurate. I just can’t, not, care. Most people have sooooooo much potential inside them, they just need someone to see behind the hurt, behind their actions….they need someone to tell them its safe to let go of the mask.”

Me: “Does everyone take off the mask?”

My Heart: “Absolutely not. Some people like to hide. It’s comfortable. They know the world they’ve created, it’s their “safe-world” and to believe they are bigger then themselves would cause them to go outside that world. They don’t want to do that, their world has been sculpted and carved into something they can predict. It’s a safe haven. And honestly, I don’t blame them for wanting to stay there.”

Me: “Did you ever have a safe-world?”

My Heart: “I did. I’d have to think on when and where… I think I built mine in a war zone. ‘Safe-worlds’ are interesting to me because they are such a representation of each person. My ‘safe-world’ was a war-zone. Where I was thriving, constantly the victor, but I was also the only warrior. No one was beside me, no one was before me. No one. I fought everything alone. Yea, that’s definitely mine….My ‘safe-world’ was me, alone. I knew what I would do, I knew what I wanted, I was predictable. I didn’t want to rely on others and I didn’t want others to fight for me, because I didn’t want to be indebted to anyone either. Alone was better.”

Me: “How did you break free of your ‘safe-world’ and into a world where you wanted more, and let yourself thrive?”

My Heart: “I’m not so sure we ever break out of our ‘safe-worlds’ alone. I think it’s always a two-person ordeal. Someone has to be outside of you, they have to be able to touch you, care for you, reach you…and you have to trust them. You have to trust their eyes, their judgement, their love… You have to be able to look at them and say, ‘Alright, I don’t know what’s out there but I know that if you’re telling me it’s greater then what I’ve created, then I’m gonna risk it’.”

Me: “So who broke you free of yours?”

My Heart: “Mine? Hmmm….. it was a process and still is, but for me it was to this day one of my greatest friends. She kinda just had this way of reminding me that what I had created has my ‘safe-world’ was a place that was super intense but it was ok. That as I let me become more me she would still be there. That my intensity wouldn’t scare her. And naturally this enabled me to become even more me which was more intense, driven and motivated…. I guess you could say her belief in what I thought would scare her is exactly realize victory didn’t have to be a solo battle.”

Me: “What happens when they fail?”

My Heart: “People who break trust when you are coming out of your ‘safe-world’ in my mind do some of the worst damage to a heart. One person can literally shatter the believe of another’s heart to think they are worth more, could find fulfillment or ever see their dreams become reality. One person screwing it up can do so much damage.

People like this…. these people who have been put through so much pain, the ones that have been shut down, the ones that have been hurt…..these hearts. That’s where heroes are hidden.

The heroes in hiding, that’s the reason why I feel so much. Because when you let yourself feel their hearts, you’ll see it. Greatness can’t hide forever…sometimes heroes just need reminding that others DO see them. Calling out greatness, you can’t do that if you don’t feel, because feeling is sight. I feel because it helps me see, it helps me see heroes and unearth them.”

Me: “If you could tell people one thing about feeling what would it be?”

My Heart: “I guess I would say to first decide if it’s good for you. No I don’t mean does it feel good, is it good FOR you? If it’s grief, feel it. If it’s love, feel it. If it’s depth, feel it. Then look at what you are able to see when you feel. Remember feeling enables sight. Is this keeping you inside your ‘safe-world’ or pushing you outside of you? Level up. It’s ok.”

 

…To be continued. 

 

 

Step 9: Thriving in the Battles

     I have tried multiple poetic ways to start this post, they have all failed. Let’s just be blunt and real about it:
     When you make the decision to live a huge life, value the impact you leave, and constantly strive to level up, life will often be difficult.
     This is not because you’ve done anything wrong. Actually it’s the opposite, you’re kinda battling the whole status quo for all of time in the history of EVER. Most people settle, we’ve discussed this so I won’t kill it again here with the whole “most people want an easy button, glad you chose the Game of Thrones” route to life. So let’s just say you chose the right path young Padawan.
Okay so in all seriousness.
     Here’s how I see it. I chose the hardest route possible when I decided that my life needed to be lived for something more. That everything we’ve talked about this far in these posts had to occur. That BIG was possible. That IMPACT was possible. That living a HUGE life was possible. This decision to live for something bigger then me was kinda my personal turning point. From here on out, I would never end up choosing the easy way. Even if I wanted to, at this point…my heart simply wouldn’t let me.
     As life goes on I constantly realize that the grass is often not greener on the other side, and no that’s not because I failed to water it. When you choose to live a life bigger then you, you are constantly pushing yourself to higher levels. This creates a continual battle. Occasionally there are moments of reprieve where you stand at the top of the mountain you are conquering and take in the view but then you notice another mountain, a bigger, greater, more thrilling mountain…
And so the story goes and off to another mountain you go conquer.
     And as long as you “stop to smell the roses” and take in the moments, this is a win. You’re conquering, you’re growing, you’re impacting.
     However, there will come a point where you exhaust yourself, where the battle is tiring, and quitting has never looked clearer. I’m still in the process of finding the best way to make it through these moments, but I’ve semi-nailed it down to a few key points.
      1. Constantly remind yourself of what’s at the top. Is it a promise your waiting on? Is it an achievement your fighting for that will change your life? Is it other people who will finally get to share in your victory? Whatever it is. Hold to what is at the top of your mountain. It’s important to not wait until you are totally exhausted to do this, trust me. It’s a lot harder to remember the simple reason that made you start to climb this mountain you may be resenting. 
     
      2. Avoid Naysayers. People love to start talking when you start complaining. As soon as you hit that “What have I done? This is stupid why should I care moment?” somehow those who didn’t support your mountain trek has ALL the reasons why you should have stayed home, on your couch….being comfortable. In these moments be VERY careful who you listen to. Remember most people want easy. And let’s be honest, if there’s an easy way normally it would make logical sense to take it. Maybe the easy way would have cost you character, maybe the easy way would have left less impact, maybe the easy way would have been through a lush trail down a beautiful hillside, not up this massive mountain with rocks, debris and a steep incline. Sure, there was easy. But you didn’t choose it for a reason. Don’t let those who don’t have your heart, didn’t make it’s decision, and aren’t wanting a massive life to cause you to question your mountain. You made the decision climb because the victory would be worth the building of character to get to the top. 
     
      3. Hang out with other climbers, group with people who want to level up. Here’s my number one point of advice (ironically placed in no. 3) If you are around people who aren’t going where you want to go. Go where you want to go without them. I have found that you normally need to start this journey alone before you find others who want to tag along or climb beside you. Alone is sometimes good, find you first, solidify what you want, and find a mountain to conquer. Trust me, there are other climbers out there…. and you will find them.

 

     4. Be careful who you let in to the close parts of your heart. I’ll let you in on a little secret. The only people I let into my inner circle are people who want more out of life. If you are interested in settling, that’s totally cool, I love you, I care about you….all that stuff and you can be my friend without a problem. But my heart, the depths of me, to know that is reserved for those who are also going to remind me why I’m fighting. Bear in mind there is a whole lotta me to know outside the depths of my heart so there’s lots for those who aren’t interested in leveling up, but the heart zone is by invitation only. I need to know that when my life gets whacky and I need someone to remind me of the whys behind my choice that those in my inner circle will step up.

     5. Don’t quit. This one is simple. Decide now. Just don’t quit. Whatever the battle,  whatever the mountain, whatever the terrain. There is some reason you decided to embark on this challenge. Don’t quit. You will make it. You will win. And when you do it will be epic.

     Sometimes I think we try to look for this perfect life, where we do all the things that we love, we thrive and we yet are never uncomfortable. That’s not life. And it’s not a life I want. I love to fight because I love to win. I love who I become. I love the feeling of reaching a climax. I love growing. I love watching others grow. I love what happens when we are uncomfortable and we embrace it. There is so much to be had in life if we can make it through the seasons that require us to armor up and battle on.
     There is a whole world waiting for impact, wanting growth, and desiring to level up. How will we ever reach them if we quit half-way up our own mountains?
     Heroes aren’t born, they are built. Let your days of struggle motivate you, let it challenge you, let it push you to push harder then ever before. Remember the victory happened at your decision to live heroically, now you just need to walk it out. Battles are an opportunity for victory.
Step 9: Pay attention to how you prepare for those rough days, and don’t quit when they hit. 
If you would like to read the prior Superhero Chronicles post you can find it here!

Step 8: Waiting on Epic.

At 4 years old I had the strap on fairy wings, I had the mask, I had the magic glitter dust….whelp that’s it, bring on the battle! I had the power, obviously, and well I I knew I was ready to conquer the whole world……. so why wait? I had it together, I was good to go. Game on bad guys, bring it! I will decimate you with my glitter powers.

That’s what I saw. My EPIC moment. And that’s all I saw. At 4 years old I had no idea what it would cost.

 

I didn’t realize that the moment I would finally take flight would take years of preparation. Or that in order to use my glitter dust I would need to have the character to use it appropriately. I didn’t know that my wings wouldn’t be mine until I could handle the weight of seeing things from above.

There’s so much I didn’t know about my epic moment. But I quickly learned, nothing about it would be easy. Nothing about impact, character, legacy, depth or selflessness is easy. And you know what makes it harder? Those who don’t care as much will almost always finish first. They will always get the first applause. And in the world’s view sometimes they are the ultimate achievers.

So how do you push through? How do you keep this impact thing up? How do you continue to fight when everyone else settles? How do you get up, gear up and battle up when you are simultaneously also fighting the status quo?

The simple answer is (as Nike knows) you just do it. You keep going. You don’t quit.

However, you also hold fast to the purpose behind your battle. Those who live heroically eventually get their moment. And let’s just be clear no this is not the point of impact. No this is not the ultimate goal of impact. But sometimes the battles get hard and you have to be able to remind yourself that what you are doing on the daily…MATTERS.

There will come a point where you will ask yourself, “Why am I trying so hard when I don’t see the victory?”

These are the times I like to entitle……WAITING ON EPIC.

Because we all want that moment. The moment where we see the impact we made. It’s rewarding, it’s encouraging! And the waiting sucks! There’s no nice way to put it, it’s hard, its tough and it SUCKS. However, those times of WAITING ON EPIC become the most formative times of life.

WAITING ON EPIC. Waiting on epic moments. Waiting on epic impact. Waiting on epic fulfillment. Waiting on epic victories. Waiting on epic promises. WAITING ON EPIC.

It is hard, it’s exhausting and most people, quit.

I know. I live here. Welcome to my whole life. I kid you not, I will blog about it eventually but let’s just say that this isn’t book theory this is “Bre Life Theory”. Waiting on epic is hard as heck.

I could quit. I could choose easy. You could quit. You could choose easy. We know we would get there faster, because others do it. We could cheat. We could short cut. We could compromise. We know it would work because others do it. We know that this is the obviously most difficult route. We know we could end the waiting. We know we could do a million other things to reach our goal. But I think we also know at the end it would just be a goal, it wouldn’t be epic. And that’s worse then any waiting.

Epic is built in the moments no one else sees.

…..Epic is what makes this whole thing so big. It’s the fact that it costs all of you. That you can’t go small. That you have to be big. It’s the limits you thought you had that you defy. It’s the depth you find inside of you. It’s what makes the waiting matter. Epic.

Waiting on Epic? This is where YOU are BUILT.

It’s not the decision to live a life of impact that builds you it’s the moments between the victories that build you. Wait did you catch that?

You are built waiting on EPIC. When you see nothing about your moment of epic victory, YOU ARE BEING BUILT. 

Without the building of you, the end is just a goal. It’s just a win. It’s just a moment. But when you see you being built between the victories. That’s where the epic happens. That’s what turns the win into an EPIC win, the moment into an EPIC moment and reaching your goal into an EPIC achievement.

Sometimes I spend so much time focusing on making this massive impact that I forget the now. I forget that the waiting on epic is what defines everything else.

Waiting on Epic. This is where I am built. The times no one sees, that’s where I become me. The battles I fight daily in secret, that’s where I become me. The moments where character wins and no one knows, that’s where I become me.

Waiting on Epic. For so long I thought that it was about this big moment that I was ready for and somehow the forces of time just had to choose me. That I was ready and I just needed someone to notice. That my climax was where the biggest part of my story would occur. This great moment, this great achievement, this great win, THAT would be my epic moment.

I was wrong. It was never a moment that was being built. It was me. It wasn’t the moment that I was waiting on. It was who I could become in the process. It wasn’t the epic I was waiting on.

 

It was me I was waiting on. 

 

Because without the me I would become, I was too small for my EPIC moment.

 

 

 

STEP 8: What is the EPIC moment you are waiting on? Now think of how you are using the waiting to become EPIC. 

 

If you missed Step 7 check it out!

 

Photo Credit 

Step 7: Facing the Fear of You.

I remember reaching a point about 5 months ago where I realized that it really didn’t matter what happened in life. It didn’t matter what turn jobs took. It didn’t matter what people stayed in my life. It didn’t matter what trials came.

I would conquer. 

Now, this all sounds great. It sounds epic and heroic and all those great things. Let’s just be totally real… it’s terrifying. It’s lonely, I felt slightly insane and it was one of the biggest “Oh Shit” moments of my whole life. Because it came with a certain level of invincibility that I knew I would choose to embrace.

And that, that scared me. It scared me more then any trial before. It scared me more then any heartache. It scared me more then any loss, pain, depth, sorrow. It scared me more then anything in my whole life.

The very fact that I knew I would choose to overcome terrified me to the core. 

It was like there became this power inside me that was separate from me yet part of me. That no matter the battle everything inside me would come alive, and I would face it. But it wasn’t just facing the battle, it was the sense that I would face it without holding back. That I would face the battle with no restraint. That I would courageously refuse to settle for anything less then absolute victory. It was as if my heart had finally been awakened and told that it was ok to feel as capable as I was. In this moment everything shifted, everything changed. And still this was only a glimpse of what my life would be…I could see thrills, depth, huge, and great things, but also the terrifying, the real, and the hard.

I couldn’t say yes to this moment without knowing that I would one day face everything at a higher degree, a greater momentum, and a more massive heart.

Anais Nin writes, “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.”

My life was going to expand. I was going to live huge..if only I had the courage to embrace it, if only I would choose to conquer the only fear I had left, if only I would choose to conquer the fear that would change EVERYTHING…..The fear of me.

People think that being broken is hard. People think that being empty is hard. People think that being hurt is hard. People think that yesterday’s pain is hard.

Yes it is. But so often we use pain, emptiness and hurt as a crutch to live within our limits. We like to feel, we were made to feel. Whether it be pain or love we were made to let something touch our heart. However, when we don’t feel that we are strong enough or worthy enough to feel love we revert to pain, heartache, and brokenness. We feel one or the other, pain or love. We make that choice everyday. And this choice we make based on our worth. If you need to, read Step 1 again. Belief in who we are is powerful to say the least.

What we don’t often realize is that what we choose to feel defines our limits.

Pain is limited.

Love is limitless.

It’s that simple. Simple but an imperative principle to understand so I’ll say it again. Pain is limited, love is limitless.

If you choose to live in pain. You will always be living in limits.

If you choose to live in love. You will always be limitless.

Take a look at the Hulk. We all know that story. He knew how powerful he was, but he was afraid, he chose fear. And in his fear he left his whole life. He lived in a box of being alone. It wasn’t until he embraced his power along with the fact that he had he was needed, he was wanted….he was LOVED, that he realized how to be truly limitless. He didn’t truly understand his power until he coupled it with understanding he was loved.

Love does crazy things to a heart. Power does crazy things to a heart. Take those two and put them together… You get the most explosive, impactful, influential people the world has ever seen.

My moment. My choice. My heart. I chose me. Real talk, I would be lying if I didn’t tell you that sometimes I think on my life and just wonder what the heck I’m doing.

….My life was easier when I cared less, My life was easier when I chose pain, My life was easier when I let heartache define my actions, My life was easier when I let jealousy, bitterness and anger write my words. My life was easier when I drank away emotion and let hurt define my love. My life has been significantly more difficult since that moment. Since the moment I stopped letting the fear of pain control my potential. Since the moment I faced my fear of me.

We are taught to fear pain, heartache and hurt so much in this world but what we don’t realize is that the fear of the whole, limitless and powerful version of you is greater. No really. We fear being whole more then we fear being empty. We fear healing more then we fear hurt. We fear love more then we fear pain. We fear what we cannot control and we can control pain.

This fear of you is rarely talked about and even more rarely faced. So this is my attempt to talk about what makes so many of us uncomfortable. The fact that maybe there is more to the pain, maybe there’s healing; more to the brokenness, maybe there’s wholeness; and more to the emptiness, maybe there’s limitless.

Let’s face it, the fear of me is massive. And everyday, I have to choose me. I have to choose not to hide in the pain and settle for brokenness. But instead embrace wholeness.

Everyday is a choice. Do I choose love or pain? I choose love. But everyday, pain offers the opportunity to come back. And everyday I know it was an easy hell to live there.

Step 7: Face the fear of you. 

 

Feel free to message, Facebook or Tweet me if you want to chat! Also, you can find the prior “Step 6” post here.

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