Tag Archives: alive

With Power.

So often I get caught in this moment where I can’t explain the life that wells inside of me, the passion I feel that runs wild through my veins, the electricity I feel in my bones, it’s a depth I can’t explain, and on the same note never want it to stop. 

Because regardless how the life inside me begins to explode, I know what it is, I know who it is, and no extreme would be to radical. Everything within me, every cell of being wants more. 

MORE. 

it’s never going to be enough. Beauty like this does something inside you. It creates a desire for more and more, because you feel something that for once in your life you were meant to desire without limits and with no fear of excess. It’s a goodness so extreme that you could never actually have too much. Because as the core of you grows, you gain ground, you gain space that can only be filled by what caused the expansion….him. 

Almost four years ago I remember reading in psalms ..”enlarge my heart” and asking, what’s in me that would benefit me being enlarged? I had no idea. 

But here it is. The heart is invaluable, it hold secrets words can’t describe, it holds beauty unique to his romancing you alone, and it holds life unlike anything I’ve ever seen with my eyes. 

There is no truer picture of theology then what I feel inside me. This is him. He isn’t definable by words alone, and that’s why I can’t find words to express the life welling up inside my heart…

 

 

…but I feel it, and never want it to stop. 

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Lost in love, made to dream, called to be the Hero.

How do I describe a life I want to see, that I haven’t found here, that I haven’t seen in its fullness but that I dream about? How do I attempt to tell you about a beautiful discontentment and have it carry the same weight in words that it carries on my heart?

I tell you that it is one of the most beautiful things to have something inside you grow so big that you want to see it in the world around you so much you ache.  That this…life, it can’t stay inside you any longer, because as crazy as it sounds it just starts to hurt.  It’s an ache for what I’ve dreamed and imagined, and to live in the contrast is difficult, very difficult. But even in the ache its beautiful, because  it’s so full, because it’s worth it, and because its life beyond measure.  Because when I talk about it…the core of me comes alive.

This is what happens in the heart of His dreamer, this is what happens when you think so big, and imagine, and create, and finally….finally know you were made to co-labor with God.  A world is birthed inside of you, and you must create it.  It’s that simple. It was put in you, it was knit into your being, into your personality, and after watching this dream, this world grow inside you, you taste it. You begin to see in your heart what fills you, what touches you….what is you, walking in such fullness.

You see, the heart of a dreamer in love with Him is radical. You begin to see more, to see from a bigger perspective, you start to lose the limits, and get creative, and not allow what seems logical to bind you. You reach a new level of living…and you can’t go back.

This world begins to grow inside you, and while it does you begin to watch as he calls back alive in you, who you are, and you realize you are the hero.  You are the radical. You are the revolutionary. You are the dream in its human form.  It was put in you, so you could draw it out.  You are strong enough, you are brave enough, and you are bold enough….because thats what it will take to make this dream reality, and its why he made you, you.  You dreamt with him, but he alone conditioned you as the hero strong enough to live it out. The hero needed to make this dream reality.

You dreamt with him, He called alive a hero.

You let your heart loose, and He glorified what you imagined.

I am a dreamer, falling in love with Jesus …in our love we dreamed of a world, and then he called me alive and made me the hero needed to create it, told me he will never leave, but gave me authority to begin to walk…to begin to create what we dreamed……TOGETHER.

It’s who I am, and it’s who he is.

…it’s beautiful, and it will be reality.

I am a dreamer lost in love.