Something happens when you finally start to remember your name? When you start to realize who he calls you? and who he sees you as?
It’s like you discover a depth you just can’t fill, it’s crazy because as much as I want to fill it. I don’t. Because this moment. This time, is so perfectly beautiful. It’s a pretty crazy thing to watch as God builds back in you…you. All so he could just be with you. Because when you didn’t see you, you missed out on a big part of him. And then he reveals colors all over you, and you begin to start dreaming big, and seeing big, and then you realize. Without holding on to this, without living for this, you will never live life fully.
It’s you and him. And its crazy beautiful.
Its this moment that as much as I am excited for what’s to come, I want to channel this and stuff it in a bottle and cork it, like priceless pixie dust. It’s a revelation, and intimacy, a depth I never want to see leave, I only want to see it grow. I want to see it explode. Because while he has told me who I am, and what I am…I realize all I want is more.
He calls us by name and he creates in us a dimension I don’t want to be able to describe, but when you start to see it…..it’s crazy. It’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen, because you come alive in a way you can’t describe, in ways where, when I fully let go, it’s gonna look a little out there. It’s going to be radical, and it’s going to be so…me.
Because the truth is, so much of the restraint I allowed myself to live by, was never who I was.
I’ve started on a road that I don’t want to see stop, I don’t even really want to end up at a destination, because in ending somewhere, it’s like saying I’m full, Ive settled in, I’m content. I don’t want to be content. I want more. I want more of this. All of this.
This identity, this beauty, this radical way of life…the one he always painted for me, it took me loosing myself to find it. But now that I have, it’s where I’m at, it’s who I am, and where I am going. It’s as simple as that, and yet way more beautiful then words could explain.
Walking by name is a whole huge adventure. And I know that to live without it…..is to not live. I don’t want to live for just okay, for just enough. I don’t want to be content with okay….I don’t want okay. I wasn’t born for just okay, and neither were you. It was never written in our spirit to live for subpar, that was always our choice. Well I say no.
I want all of this, and everything more, I don’t want to be satisfied, and I don’t want to be contained. I want everything in me to explode, to let out me and him… It’s a love song, that will come alive in my life.
One radical beautiful adventure….only beginning, and the end isn’t in sight. This is what he wants us to see, he wants us to know who he created so perfectly, and how much he always just wanted to be with us.